Shrimp Vest recently got back from a 3 week visit to his hometown in the Philippines. I try to avoid him because of the smell, so I haven't really talked to him since he got back. But today I had to talk to him about work, and it turned into a personal conversation:
Me: This project has to go out by the end of the year, so if you're taking any time off for the holidays, it's got to get done before you leave.
SV: Of course I'm taking some time off. You're not?
Me: I don't have any vacation days left.
SV: Neither do I, but I just take them unpaid. You could too.
Me: Well, I'm trying to save money for a couple trips next year.
SV: Yeah, me too. I'm going back to the Philippines next year to check on the house that I'm having built there.
Me *excited*: Oh, a retirement house?!?!
SV: Yeah, maybe a retirement house. We'll see.
Umm, if you're not sure that you're going to retire there, then why are you building a house there??
SV: It will depend on money, you know, if I can retire there or not. Right now I have to send $1,200 every month to the Philippines to take care of my wife's house. You know, for the gardener, the maintenance guy, the maid. It's very expensive to maintain a house. So I'm not sure if I can retire. I might need to keep making money so I can send it for my wife's house.
I didn't ask for clarification as to what he meant by his "wife's house," but I assume he meant the house she grew up in. But why would they still own that house? They both moved to the States decades ago. And it doesn't sound like any other family lives there now if they have hired a staff to look after the house. And his wife is dead, so I don't see any reason to keep the house for sentimental value or whatever. But I didn't ask. Also, if you already own a house in the Philippines, why are you building a new house for yourself? Why not just retire to the house you already own??
SV: My options are to either get rid of the house all together, or pay 100% of the costs myself to keep the house maintained. So I've got to keep paying. You know, what can you do?
Umm, I think you just said you could get rid of the house all together....
SV: So I might need to keep working so I can afford to keep sending the money every month for the house. And I REALLY overspent on my trip last month. I had budgeted $20,000 for my trip. But when I got there, I saw that the church had been destroyed in the typhoon last year. So I ended up spending $170,000 on my trip, so I could pay to repair the church for a few years.
WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!? 170 THOUSAND?!?!?!?!?!?!???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SV: Just a temporary fix, you know, to keep it going for a few more years. Then I will go back in 2017 and have it torn down so it can be rebuilt the right way, because this was just temporary.
$150,000 is only enough for a "temporary" fix???
SV: You know, as long as I have the money in 2017. I think I will, but I sort of blew my budget for this trip a little bit.
"Sort of" blew the budget? $150,000 extra is "sort of" blowing the budget???
So the moral of this story is, he's got an extra $150,000 lying around. But he can't buy a new sweatervest.
Monday, December 8, 2014
Friday, August 22, 2014
Consistency
I'm modifying some circuit breaker drawings for work, and the existing drawings are not consistent with each other. Some show just the model number of the breaker; others show just the amperage of the breaker; others show both; and others show none of this information at all. Our typical practice when modifying drawings is to follow the existing convention of that drawing. So I did. However, my reviewer was frustrated that I had not made the decision to deviate from following the existing convention of the drawing; he had wanted me to show both pieces of information on all the drawings, regardless of what was there before. Although everyone else in my group (including my supervisor) stepped into the conversation and told him it was typical to follow the existing drawing convention and that other drawings showed that information anyway, the reviewer was not satisfied, and began lecturing about consistency:
R: It's like Starbucks.
(sidebar.....nuclear engineering is nothing like Starbucks)
R: I can go to any Starbucks and it's always the same coffee no matter what. Because they are consistent. They found a way that works and they stick to it no matter what. Consistency. That's what matters. When I get coffee at Starbucks, whether it was a year ago, or today, or 5 years from now, I know it's going to taste the same. Because their coffee is always consistent. That's why they are still in business and that's why they are so popular. Whether I get my coffee at a Starbucks here in the city, or near my house, or in Florida when I visit my daughter, I can always be sure that it will taste the same everywhere I go, no matter when. Because they know consistency!
C: You get your coffee at Starbucks?
P: You should go to Dunkin Donuts. It's much better, and cheaper too.
R: Oh no. I don't drink coffee.
R: It's like Starbucks.
(sidebar.....nuclear engineering is nothing like Starbucks)
R: I can go to any Starbucks and it's always the same coffee no matter what. Because they are consistent. They found a way that works and they stick to it no matter what. Consistency. That's what matters. When I get coffee at Starbucks, whether it was a year ago, or today, or 5 years from now, I know it's going to taste the same. Because their coffee is always consistent. That's why they are still in business and that's why they are so popular. Whether I get my coffee at a Starbucks here in the city, or near my house, or in Florida when I visit my daughter, I can always be sure that it will taste the same everywhere I go, no matter when. Because they know consistency!
C: You get your coffee at Starbucks?
P: You should go to Dunkin Donuts. It's much better, and cheaper too.
R: Oh no. I don't drink coffee.
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Different
There's a guy I've been working with for 6 years. His 'name' is R. English is not his first language. He calls me "Laura."
At first it seemed to me that it was probably some sort of language barrier. Perhaps his culture doesn't have "en" names. Perhaps they just pronounce "en" as "a". Perhaps he did know that my name is Lauren, but just thought I prefered a shortened version. Of the 6 people in my department (himself included) I am the only person who doesn't shorten their name; so maybe he thought I did.
My nametag says Lauren, my work email address is Lauren.E.McKinney@, my emails are signed Lauren, but maybe he thought Lauren was my professional name but I prefer friends/associates to call me Laura. Perhaps he thought all the people calling me Lauren were just out of the loop. Perhaps he thought he and I were close enough to qualify for nickname status. A lot of possibilities come to mind. But whatever the case may have been, he's always called me Laura, and I've always responded without question. Then this happened today:
R: Laura, what is this link you emailed me? Do I need to open the link?
Me: Huh?
R: This link you emailed me. What is this?
I didn't email him anything, so I went over to his desk to check it out. It was spam from LinkedIn titled, "Laura from Planet is trying to contact you!"
Me: Oh, that's just spam. That's not from me.
R: So I should delete it?
Me: Yeah.
R: Oh okay. I just wanted to make sure because I thought maybe you were trying to email me a link to something.
Me: No. That's spam. It has nothing to do with me.
R: Well I thought maybe though, cause it's from Laura.
Me: Right, so it has nothing to do with me.
R: *blank stare*
Coworker: Her name is Lauren.
R: Laur.....en?
Coworker: Yeah, Lauren.
R: Not Laura?
Coworker: No. It's Lauren.
R: Laura and Lauren are different?!
Coworker: Yes!
R: Laura. Lauren. Laura. Laur.....en?
Coworker: Yeah. Lauren. E-N.
R: But I've been calling you Laura for years and years!
Me: I know.
R: Even back when we were on another floor on that other project.
Me: Yes, I remember.
R (looking at the nametag on my cubicle wall): l-a-u-r-E-N. Not A. E-N. Like, Laur-EN.
Me: Yep.
R: So it's not Laura then?
Me: Nope.
R: Oh boy.
R: It's Laur-EN?!?!
Coworker: Yeah. E-N. Not A.
R: But Laura is easier to say.
Coworker: Well that's not really her name though.
Me: If it's easier for you to call me Laura, that's fine.
R (pulls a business card from his wallet and puts on my desk): See my doctor's name.....Laura. That's a real name!
Me: I know it's a real name.
Coworker: It's just not her name.
R: I see that. But it's a real name. Laura. Like my doctor's name. The first 4 letters are the same!
Me: You can call me whatever you want. It's fine.
R: Laur-EN. Oh boy......
At first it seemed to me that it was probably some sort of language barrier. Perhaps his culture doesn't have "en" names. Perhaps they just pronounce "en" as "a". Perhaps he did know that my name is Lauren, but just thought I prefered a shortened version. Of the 6 people in my department (himself included) I am the only person who doesn't shorten their name; so maybe he thought I did.
My nametag says Lauren, my work email address is Lauren.E.McKinney@, my emails are signed Lauren, but maybe he thought Lauren was my professional name but I prefer friends/associates to call me Laura. Perhaps he thought all the people calling me Lauren were just out of the loop. Perhaps he thought he and I were close enough to qualify for nickname status. A lot of possibilities come to mind. But whatever the case may have been, he's always called me Laura, and I've always responded without question. Then this happened today:
R: Laura, what is this link you emailed me? Do I need to open the link?
Me: Huh?
R: This link you emailed me. What is this?
I didn't email him anything, so I went over to his desk to check it out. It was spam from LinkedIn titled, "Laura from Planet is trying to contact you!"
Me: Oh, that's just spam. That's not from me.
R: So I should delete it?
Me: Yeah.
R: Oh okay. I just wanted to make sure because I thought maybe you were trying to email me a link to something.
Me: No. That's spam. It has nothing to do with me.
R: Well I thought maybe though, cause it's from Laura.
Me: Right, so it has nothing to do with me.
R: *blank stare*
Coworker: Her name is Lauren.
R: Laur.....en?
Coworker: Yeah, Lauren.
R: Not Laura?
Coworker: No. It's Lauren.
R: Laura and Lauren are different?!
Coworker: Yes!
R: Laura. Lauren. Laura. Laur.....en?
Coworker: Yeah. Lauren. E-N.
R: But I've been calling you Laura for years and years!
Me: I know.
R: Even back when we were on another floor on that other project.
Me: Yes, I remember.
R (looking at the nametag on my cubicle wall): l-a-u-r-E-N. Not A. E-N. Like, Laur-EN.
Me: Yep.
R: So it's not Laura then?
Me: Nope.
R: Oh boy.
R: It's Laur-EN?!?!
Coworker: Yeah. E-N. Not A.
R: But Laura is easier to say.
Coworker: Well that's not really her name though.
Me: If it's easier for you to call me Laura, that's fine.
R (pulls a business card from his wallet and puts on my desk): See my doctor's name.....Laura. That's a real name!
Me: I know it's a real name.
Coworker: It's just not her name.
R: I see that. But it's a real name. Laura. Like my doctor's name. The first 4 letters are the same!
Me: You can call me whatever you want. It's fine.
R: Laur-EN. Oh boy......
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
That's the point
Every week my supervisor attends a meeting where one of the topics is "Error Prevention Tools," which most weeks seems to just be a different way of phrasing "think before you act." And that was no different where this week's topic was "think about all the potential consequences of your actions before you act." It was demonstrated by this picture:
So these guys have put a table in the middle of their pool, placed a grill on the table, plugged the grill into a power strip that's floating on some flip flops, the power strip is plugged into an extension cord that's held in place with a door wedge and some duct tape, and the extension cord is plugged into who knows where. So the obvious lesson is that these guys should have thought about how dangerous that could be---electricity and water. Obvious, right?
So I work with this guy, R, who is a real pain-in-the-ass-thinks-he's-better-and-smarter-than-everyone type. Our supervisor, P, came back from this meeting and was going over the agenda items with us. He showed us this picture:
R: What the hell is that?! Do you see that?! Do you see what's going on there?
P (joking): That was B's pool party over the weekend. (B is a coworker)
R: Well someone needs to tell him right away that what they are doing is dangerous!! Do you see that?! I should go talk to him!! (R doesn't understand the concept of joking or sarcasm)
P: I'm kidding! It's not B.
R: It's not?!
P: No. It's just a picture from the internet.
R: Well who are those guys?! Someone needs to tell him right away that what they are doing is dangerous!!
P: I don't know who they are. It's just an example.
R: Well the first thing I notice is that they are being dangerous! Do you see that?! I notice these things!! (like he's the only one who spotted the problem.....um.....that's kind of the point that the picture was trying to make.....)
P: Yeah, we all see it. It's just trying to make you think about what the consequences of your actions might be.
R: Well I would tell those guys that what they are doing is very dangerous! Trust me! I know what I'm talking about! I've been a wiring designer for 35 years! So I know! You should NEVER mix water with electricity like that! That could be dangerous!!
P (joking): Well maybe they were just trying to keep the water warm.
R: No! That's not the way to keep water warm! That's very dangerous!! What are they thinking?! They make heaters for pools. That's what they should get! Not rig up this thing. Look how dangerous that is!! Do you see that?! Someone needs to let them know!
P (joking): Well why don't you go try to find them and tell them that.
R: I will tell them! They work here?
P: No! I was kidding about going to find them. I told you, it's just a picture from the internet.
R: Well someone should find them and tell them it's not safe! And they should trust me because I'm a wiring designer for 35 years, so I know!!
P: All right already. I think the picture made it's point.
R: That's not what I'm concerned about though! Making a point or not, someone needs to let them know that's a very dangerous way to heat a pool! That's all I'm saying. And they can trust me! 35 years experience!!
P: All right. We're done here.
So these guys have put a table in the middle of their pool, placed a grill on the table, plugged the grill into a power strip that's floating on some flip flops, the power strip is plugged into an extension cord that's held in place with a door wedge and some duct tape, and the extension cord is plugged into who knows where. So the obvious lesson is that these guys should have thought about how dangerous that could be---electricity and water. Obvious, right?
So I work with this guy, R, who is a real pain-in-the-ass-thinks-he's-better-and-smarter-than-everyone type. Our supervisor, P, came back from this meeting and was going over the agenda items with us. He showed us this picture:
R: What the hell is that?! Do you see that?! Do you see what's going on there?
P (joking): That was B's pool party over the weekend. (B is a coworker)
R: Well someone needs to tell him right away that what they are doing is dangerous!! Do you see that?! I should go talk to him!! (R doesn't understand the concept of joking or sarcasm)
P: I'm kidding! It's not B.
R: It's not?!
P: No. It's just a picture from the internet.
R: Well who are those guys?! Someone needs to tell him right away that what they are doing is dangerous!!
P: I don't know who they are. It's just an example.
R: Well the first thing I notice is that they are being dangerous! Do you see that?! I notice these things!! (like he's the only one who spotted the problem.....um.....that's kind of the point that the picture was trying to make.....)
P: Yeah, we all see it. It's just trying to make you think about what the consequences of your actions might be.
R: Well I would tell those guys that what they are doing is very dangerous! Trust me! I know what I'm talking about! I've been a wiring designer for 35 years! So I know! You should NEVER mix water with electricity like that! That could be dangerous!!
P (joking): Well maybe they were just trying to keep the water warm.
R: No! That's not the way to keep water warm! That's very dangerous!! What are they thinking?! They make heaters for pools. That's what they should get! Not rig up this thing. Look how dangerous that is!! Do you see that?! Someone needs to let them know!
P (joking): Well why don't you go try to find them and tell them that.
R: I will tell them! They work here?
P: No! I was kidding about going to find them. I told you, it's just a picture from the internet.
R: Well someone should find them and tell them it's not safe! And they should trust me because I'm a wiring designer for 35 years, so I know!!
P: All right already. I think the picture made it's point.
R: That's not what I'm concerned about though! Making a point or not, someone needs to let them know that's a very dangerous way to heat a pool! That's all I'm saying. And they can trust me! 35 years experience!!
P: All right. We're done here.
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